Life, Love and Everything else

1:28pm: wow! Cornerstone
So, I have realized that I am pretty fucked up in the head. I have always known it but this weekend when i was really drunk I told Maddie something that I have held onto my whole life. Someone fucked me up and didnt even realize it. well I have to jet.

6:58pm: wow! I'm back...sort of.
Well, it's been a while kids. I haven't posted in livejournal in so long...myspace stole me away. lol Well, I guess I need to catch everyone up a lil bit (if anyone even reads this thing anymore). The last time I posted I was with Colby...well there has been a few different guys in my life since then. Now don't get my wrong. I said that Colby was something special and he was but he just was not that special for to long. He turned more so into special ed....lol j/k I love Colby to death and he is now a days one of my best friends. I have graduated since my last post and I have also become and ADULT! SCARY! I know. Well, I can now go to big kids d.t....jail! About that whole Jail subject...Cole is back there. It's not to bad though. He would have been in Prison but they are too full so he got sent to some lil jail in Bever county or some shit like that. He is turning his life around and so have I. I have stopped doing to many drug. I will be rolling on the 29th (maybe) for halloween but I have not done any in a long time and I wont do anymore for a while. I just have to get that lil fix to keep me going for a bit. I also got a new and better job. I work at a dealership answering the phones and playing on the computer. Me and my friend Tommy got in a pretty bad car accident a few months ago and that really changed me. for the good? I dont know...lets hope so though. I also got a car for my 18th birthday. I have not drivin it yet but thats a long story that I dont really want to get into right now so if you dont know it then oh fuckin well...you never will know it then :) I took out some of my percings but I will be getting more tattoos in weeks to come. I still plan on getting a lot of tats and most likely will for the rest of my life. Well, I really have anything else to catch people up with. My life is pretty chill now a days. Most of my time consist of going to work on the days that I have to and on the other days I chill with my good friends and do what we do best....blaze it up. well I am out now...peace love and doobbies :)

11:09am: AMAZING!
Well this weekend was the best one that has been in a long time...or corse I was with the E-tard group. on freday tommy cc and maura saved me from school and then we jsut chilled all day. Maura CC and Al fryed and that was way fun then on saturday was the Rave. oh my god that was the best rave that i have been to. I took one pill at 9 and then colby put another one in my mouth at about 11. then when we got back to justins at about 3 cassie was frying her ass off..she took about 20-30 hits at the rave. she was freaking out and i was the only one that could really calm her down it was wierd. well then me colby cc and justin sat in the club house(bathroom) from about 3:30 to about 1pm on sunday afternoon just snorting pills the whole time. it was so much god damn fun. i will never forget that night....plus on that night me and colby decided to officially be together. im so happy. we are together and everything is great. That kid really is something special. :)

8:08pm: New Years Eve!
well its tonight....i cant wait. All of the e-tard group is going to justins and it will be really fun. right now maddie and Kief are fighting and its really funny. well yeah so I guess there is not much to say other then Happy new year to you all. :)

7:54am: crapy-mick-craperson!
Yeah so I was finally able to sheck my myspace the other day and I got a message from Trevor(really cute E-tard :p) haha yeah I think that the group..well I know that the group is all rolling this weekend cuz its Richards birthday :p I cant wait. Well I have not seen Mark in a while and I think that I am just done with that kid. I dont feel like I am going to get anything out of what ever is going on so I will just forget about it and if anything happenes then let it happen. :p well my tummy hurts really bad right now.:( well I feel like shit and I have to finish a essay for english so im out. later kiddos. :p

11:14am: Last night!
Well last night was fun. Mike and Lulu picked me up at school and us 3 and Monique went to the mall and jsut hung otu all day till Mike had to go to a work party. Then us girls went to hang out with Cory dave Austin and Andrew. We went to Dave's and got drunk and Monique ran through the screen door. It was soooo funny!! but yeah last night was really fun cuz I had not hung out with Austin and Cory in a really long time. Well yeah then we came home and ordered Pizza. It ruled! Well last night was also realy wierd at times...#1 Cory and teh random stuff...cool but wierd #2 all the girly stuff...im not a girly girl and it was wired.

12:16am: yesterday.
well yesterday was really fun. Me and lulu went and hung out with Brandon and played free games. We also saw Jared up at there work. I missed that kid. Well then we went and hung out with Dave and Dreu. Those kids are really cool. To bad they just left for there tour. :( oh well I guess we are going to hang out when they get back and plus they have a show on the first that me and Lulu are going to go to. I cant wait to see them play. From what Lulu tells me they are pretty good. Well yeah and then today I stayed home form the cabin. me and Steph played for a while and then I went to the mall and got applications. I dont want a job but i need one so very badly. If anyone knows of a good job let me know. Well then I wiated around at the mall for about two hours for a ride that never showed and Ross actually thought that he coudl bail on me and then use me for my back yard. He and Dani wanted to boom. Well then I came home and Cody came and got me and Steph and we played for a while with Goose and his people. well yeah I am going to go now. I am sorry about this post being so dumb but its not like anyone really reads them anyways. well what I really wanted to talk aobut (what has been on my mind allllll day) I cant really talk about. I dont want to get anyone in trouble with a sertine someone. well laters. <3

7:06am: yester-year
Well it was good. I went to school. Came home, talked to dusty (text), played with Paige and Maddie then went back home and called Lulu back....then she came over at like 10ish and we just chilled for a bit. It was fun. I miss her. Then when she left I tried to make dusty talk to me again but that damn kid and all of the sleep that he needs. I swear he needs as much sleep as a new born to make him happy. well Laters. <3

2:41pm: yester-year!
Well, it sucked. I had to go to a funeral for my great uncle Chino. It was horable. I hate funerals. I also hate the fact that I am starting to use laughter as a way of covering sadness. I actualy started to laugh at the funeral. I had to bite the inside of my lip to stop. Then I want home and cleaned my room and waited for paige...and she never showed. so I called her and long story short we kind of got into a fight. I felt like shit already for earlier that day and then her just bailing and changing the palans jsut pissed me off. Then I started to watch "the smokers" agian when steph call and she came over and stayed the night. when we woke up we went to the mall and got me new rings for my lip. they kick so much ass. well yeah then I jsut came home and painted my nails. They look like pepdo-bismal (spelling, I dont care..you get the point) they are a ugly pink and it rules. well I think that I am going to go write an e-mailo now...laters. <3

10:45pm: toady...not that great.
Well yeah today was sortoflame. I am having major problemswith spacing right now cuz the computer is dumb so yeah. get over it. well yeah I am just up at maddies right now and it sucks. I wanted to get drunk but everyone jsut pitched in for bud and I dont want to smoke so I am all sober and alone with my slurpie with no one to even make out with. I hope that we end up watching a movie or I am just going to pass out. so monique admited that she is a slut. it was funny. well I am out. LATERS!

2:01pm: even more...
...well last night got even more interesting after I posted. Yeah I really dont want to go into it that much but it was fun. Shit happened that was funny and then Matt got out the leaf blower. That was crazy madness. We didnt sleep at all so I got home and slept and it was awesome. We just stayed up all night playing cards and talking. Man I hope that we start hanging out with those guys a lot more. Expetialy this kid Zack. Hes kew. Well yeah so actually now that I think about it was are going to hang out with them in a few hours. We are going to the vegan BBQ. Not to eat or anything but just to hang out and have fun. It should be but bryan is coming. Its so wierd. I have been getting some wierd vibes from Ross. Well people are here so I am going to go. oh yeah one more thing...I! Yes me! I got the drum stick that they through at the show.HAHA TSOL drum stick! WHAT NOW BITCHES!!!!

5:26am: the show!
oh my fuckin god! Today was to awesome. We went to TSOL. That ruled all. I saw Frankie up there and that was kew. Well I cant type today :( well yeah so we also went to a party to this kid Matts house. It was way fun. We had boing matches and that was way kew. Plus when we were at the show I surfed and I moshed prety much the whole time. It was bad ass. So yeah I am having problems and need a smoke! laters!

11:07pm: HUZZAH!
Well I am just in the best mood ever. Ben just called and wanted me to come over and hang out..but I couldnt. oh well I am still really happy cuz we are going to play tomorrow. Man I have been so busy with school shit and he has been so busy with moving into Pinky's and all of that other stuff that we have not even seen eachother in weeks :(:( that makes me really sad. But not anymore. Man for the most part..(except for my mom) this day was amazing. I got a really good score on a test that I didnt even study for(Im SMRT)then me and Dusty are all kew and shit, its still a little bit akward but oh well. HAHA I guess that he was worrying about it too. That makes me feel sort of good. Then I got two smokes at luncch, talked to Derrick which was fun. Got a free soda, plus I know that I get to see Ben. Oh! I cant believe that I met that kid. He is just so amazingly awesome. He loves Op. Ivy and he has a hauck...I know that I have said this before but Im just really excited. Well I am going to go now. Try to get even more sleep. Sleep rocks my world more then..more then..STUFF!

4:07pm: I hate my mom. I wish that she would just go die or something. Well yeah my day was amazing until I had to get in the car with that horid wench. I just want to kill her sometimes. Well any ways my court fine is paid and now all I have to work on is geting money to go to the concert. I cant wait. Plus there is going to be a big party after so that should be really fun tomorrow night.:):)

9:01pm: STOP TALKING YOU FUCKERS!!!
stop talkng on my live journal your fuck faces....i really hate everyone right now. all i want to do is have fun with maddie and that is not workingout right now cuz of bryan and his fuck ass ways. man i relaly hate everyone right now and i really dont care if they know it. yeah i hate lucy, karlie(who was supossed to be one of my best friends..haha yeah right) i hate jeff, amanda, bryan, ross(not that much),and right now i even hate dusty. i am not mad at him anymore about being a fuck ass but i do hate him all the same. i jsut really wish that i can get through this year with out any more drama...haha yeah the fuck right. well i have something fun to look forword to..jared party. yeah i know that i meet him through lucy but i dont give a fuck. i am going to his party and i am going to have fun. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!! i really like that word a lot right now. FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!

well on a happier note i went to judge today and it was way fun. my dad and tyler came back a few days ago...i love that they are bacdk but i really hate that my mom has turned into a mega bitch. i cant take her shit anymore. i wont to kill her. well i havent talked to ben in a while but thats kew. i jsut hope that things work out with me and him. i am pretty sure that they will but yeah. i am jsut really stressed out right now. i...i...i am going to go. fuck all of you basterds that are reading this. expetially all of your fuck faces that have your own little conversations on my posts. i hate you all. jsut go die.

4:53pm: drunkerds!!!
well last night was wierd. i got drunk with paige maddie and jill. that was way fun up till we went to joshys to hang out. lucy and amanda were there and i just really wanted to kill them. they have taken over karlie and now she will become one of those crazy bitches..oh well its not that much of a loss. she has been wierd lately. yeah so i guess that lucy and amanda were talking shit on me right in font of her and she did not even back me up. what a whore!!! oh well. so yeah school starts soon and i really dont want to go back. i hate that place and all of the people that go there. plus earl moved to riverview so now i only have one good teacher there. all the others can just burn in hell. well im out. :):):)<3

7:46pm: hello world!!!
so yeah life is good rihg tnow. i have been hanging out with ben a lot lately. i really like him. he is just so fun to be around. oh man i am really sleepy!!! i only slept fo rlike two hours last night. so i got busted for curfew agian the other night. no ticket cuz the pig didnt have prbable cause but i got in trouble with my mom. i think that she knows that i smoke now. i think that the cop told her but she has not said anything to me yet. well and she has not found oout about my lip yet. i think that she knows but yet again she has not said anything. i love how my mom is denial about everything that i am. oh well if she is going to be dumb then i will aswell. well i really have nothing else to say right now..well out to smoke!!!

2:21pm: oh my fuckin god!!!!!
so i went to incubus and it was WAY kick ass. i saw jay and mitch and chaz and a lot of other ppl. it was fun. so am sitting at bryans house and he said that he can make better quesadias then molcasalsa and yeah so i am going to pierce my lip so ...cigtime...im out!!!!....

i jsut pierced my lip and i am so fuckin happy. well i can write more now so here i go... me paige and maddie were driving and we picked up this hot kid that was at the mall and gave hima ride. well anyways he has been calling me all day to hang out and it should be fun. well the really klew part of the story is that he is 23...that means that he can buy me stuff..get it. no i wouldnt use him like that. he seems to nice to do that to. well i dont know if io already told the l/j world about this already lbut here i go...i saw Dusty at r.m.r...with his new woman. it was really funny. i saw him and wanted to vomit. when he looked at me i made a vomit jester..hahaha i rule the world. so me and one of my other l/j frineds are now talking again and i am really happy about that. well i am out now. toodles.:):):)<3

5:01pm: so yeah i am jsut sitting at paiges right now with ross, maddie and paige. it is really hot right now and i just want to die. me and maddie really want to get drunk. we have wanted to for the past week..... ROSS MUST DIE RIGHT NOW!!!!!!! he wont stop playing with my phone!!!! oh well so yeah. i thnk that i might go hang out with ashley tomorrow. i have not seen her in a long time and she got me a shot glass for florida and her mom is going to get me drunk. so yeah i am going to go now cuz there is really nothing else to talk about!!!!

6:28pm: so this is whats up...
....so kyeah ihave not posted in a long time and the last one i did post i was REALLY drunk!!! well yeah so i have been hanging out with some new ppl lately. Paige, Ross, Bryan, Maddie, Liz, Thomas...and other pl. i met them from tony. he goes to church with ross...so yeah ross....i have a lot to say about him. well Paige and Maddie hooked us up...yeah it was funny. everyone in the group knew about it. it was really wierd at first but oh well. i really likke him a lot and he treats me a LOT better then anyone else ever has... well yeah so yeah i dont think that i will be going to murray next year. the other day my mom was freaking out at me aobu tmy u's and jsut told her to do what ever she wanted to to me. well she grounded me for about 7 minutes and then came in and jsut told em athat she gave up on me....dinner...well that was fun...so me and paige are going to jet out of here. my moms at the cabin so she is going ot "stay" at my house...i think we might jsut stay and hang out at ross's all night. we tend to do that a lot altely. well i guess that i am out now...bye kiddoes....

6:01pm: drunk and honest!!!!
ok. so me and karlie are shillin at here house jsut drinking beer and talking aboutthe good ol' days. i really mioss everyne....welll we are just haveing funn drinkin beer and talking about shit. i have to admite that i am kew
we have been talking about how me miss tha good ol' days. i hvae said that but you have to thikn about how drubnk i am. wellyah. i just was tlaking ato karlie and randomely siad that i wanted to post on l/j....well yeah so here i go.,,,,,...i have so much on my mind. i miss everyone...i miss jay, josh alli, karlie...i know that i am chillin wiht aher now but it has been a while/....well i also miss other ppl but karlei told me not to put there names so i wont....welll i jsut have to sayt aht if ppl are readding this witch i know that they wont i just want them to call me cuz i miss tem alll..........................................................................................i miss you like the flower misses the sun............love you mitha ll my heart,................well karlie want to post so im out...........................................................................FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKkkkkk welll bye im love you al;l.

6:21pm: PANDA!!!!!!
well i guess i am going to post...its not like anyone reads this so i guess i will jsut post what ever the fucki i want to....well heres what has been on my mind lately.....boys and how much they suck. so i talked to dusty the other day...it was fun but kind of wierd all at the same time. i went out to see him after work one night. we only got to chill for like 20 minutes but oh well. yeah he was flirting with me all day and then when we chill that night he jsut plays it off as a joke....haha i think that it was jsut because i told him that i was going to tell his future girl about it. oh well. well i am going to end taht on the note of me saying that i am a PANDA!!! well inside joke...haha you know what i mean. well i have also been thainking about one of my firneds.. Joe Lucero. i think that i might really like him. he is so cool and i just love to be with him. well not lately. he has been kind of mean the past week. oh well. i bet that he will be happy when we going hicking.....we will be really drunk...haha i know that its dumb to going hicking and to drink but we really dont give a fuck. well yeah so i saw jew that other day and it was wierd. he all talked to me....i dont like him so why did he do that....oh well. so yeah lucy moved and that makes me really sad. i miss her. so i think that it is really wierd how all of my friends are now hooking up. it makes all of us other ppl in the group feel all wierd but if them being together makes them happy that i am happy for you guys. well i have a lot to say right now but i have to go do anthonys hair.....i will jsut post later....<3 im out!!!!

10:31am: what now bitchs!!!!!
oh my fuckin god i am so fuckin happy right now. i am only in my second day of remediation and i am totaly done. all i have to do is write a bull shit essay on my hobbies...i am going to do it on music. all i have to do is write and tell him why he should like my hobbie. oh my fuckin god i am freakin out. i am the first one done....oh man i rule the world.....

2:02am: a damn good week!!!!
well yeah i have had a really good week. i have spent most of it with jason and john and sam and all of those wierd kids. it has been really fun. the other day i bitched out dusty and told him off. it was great. i told him that i could not belive that i wasted my time with his ugly ass. haha then he got all mad and stoped talkinmg to me...haah it was great!!!!!

welli met this really cool kid. well i did not met him well i have already known him but i just started to chill with him. i have always thpought that he is really cute and all but i have got to know him and i really dig him. soem ppl might know him his name is Joe Lucero....oh my god he is really hot. and i really like him a lot. we talked to him tonight about him likeing me and yeah well iu guess he does. well...well i am done talking about this for now.....i jsut have to say taht i really cant wait to hang out with him tomorrow.:):):):) well yeah i got kind of drunk tomight and it is way fuckijn fun....right now i am at ashleys house and her DRUNK mom is fuckin around with some ouf our friends.,...it is great. well i am going to go now...well yeah ....haha long ass post...sorry....haha so excited to shill with Joe.....:):):):):)

10:45am: tripy!!!!!!!!!!!
So, I had one of the kewest dreams ever last night. Me my mom and Tyler (brtoher) were at the air port and they were giving away tickets to the Kottonmouth King concert and i was freakingout so they just gaven them to the people who won and then to make themselves look good they gave me two tickets aswell. They had this big old news coverageon it and shit. It was way rad. Well and then the other night i had a dream about my Wayne and Brandon. Oh man i really miss them. I want to see them right now!!!!!!!!!!!! Well that didnt work. So yeah i want to Disney land yeaster-year. It was prety fun. My dad got scared on the splash mt. thing. He thought that we were going to die.... haha silly stoner!!!! well and then the indian adverture thing was WAY good. (this kid in the room is REALLY hot). I even screamed on it. HAHA dont tell!!! well the rest of it prety much sucked. Pirates of the carabian would have been good but it broke down when we were on it....LAME! Well and then...i guess that there is no more to tell. Oh yeah it was dustys birthday yester day.....I was going to be mean and not say anything but I gave in. i sent him an e-mail. haha welli guess I am out. PEACE